Author’s note: Another article from the News in Brief section of the Brains Trust. A silly piece of whimsy, that is obviously massively insulting to Belgium, but given that they forgot to have a government for several years, it’s probably fair enough. This contains one of my favourite things: the Belgian Eurovision song entry “Boom-bang-a-bang, buy-me-a-beer”. Also Belgian Premier Guy Thingamebob
Furious Belgians demanded an immediate apology from the EU today as it emerged that they had been overlooked in the EU Presidency round and the role had gone straight from Sweden to Spain. “We completely forgot about them,” admitted an embarrassed Romano Prodi. “What’s so terrible is that I had written their name on a whole load of Post-It notes and stuck them all round my office specifically to avoid this sort of thing. The problem is, they’re just too boring. I simply assumed they’d done the job for 6 months and I’d slept through it.” Belgian Premier Guy Thingamebob fumed “It’s an outrage. We had prepared an EU extravaganza to celebrate the role. We had booked a couple of fireworks, some kiddie-porn videos and fifteen billion litres of beer. And I’ve no idea what we’re going to do with all that mayonnaise”
Professor of European Studies at Oxford University, Dr. Hugo Z. Hackenbush, commented. “This sort of thing was bound to happen eventually. My suggestion is that they change the election rules and use the results of the Eurovision song contest to decide the premiership, although Belgium’s last entry ‘Boom-bang-a-bang, buy-me-a-beer’ scored zero points so it wouldn’t have helped them much in this case.”
Belgium is expected to launch formal complaint to the EU as soon as they can wake someone up.
Sex and Drugs and Growing Old 